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June 19, 2011

Happy Father's Day Papa


I know that you won't be able to read this post anytime soon or maybe never. I could have just given you a letter telling you how much thankful I am to have you as my father than write something here knowing that you won't be able to read it. Well, I will just send you endearing text messages and 'I love you' for  today. I am a person coward and shy to say in front of you the things I always wanted to say. Yet in this place I get the courage to say what I should have said long before. So I hope one day you can read this one, for you to know what my heart speaks which my mouth always keeps mum about.

I'm Sorry
  • I'm sorry for I always disagree with your ideas, opinions, comments and the like. I always don't want to give you the pleasure that I acknowledge that you're right. There's something in me that wants to simply go against your ideas. Maybe if you could talk kindly and if you stop your commanding voice like Hitler, I think there's no problem for me to agree with you. You have a great mind, Pa. Sorry for not telling you that personally. Sometimes I wonder why you did not become a lawyer because you've got good reasoning. 
  • I'm sorry for I always go to mama's side when the two of you are fighting. I'm sorry, I love mama more. Besides, you're emotionally stronger compared to her so you don't need a 'kakampi'.
  • I'm sorry for failing you. I know that you have great expectations to me in my academics and I haven't able to reach that standard. It's not over yet though, please be patient. And oh! i have to remind you that you have a good daughter and I think you should be thankful with that. I don't engage in pre-marital sex and get pregnant. I don't have a boyfriend. I don't drink alcohol. I don't take drugs. I don't smoke. 
  • I'm sorry for not being affectionate to you as I am with mama. You are not affectionate  to me either so I think you are okay with that.
  • I'm so sorry for hating you last year. I understand you now. You got mad at me not because you hated me but because you were hurt. I'm really sorry Pa for hating you.. :''''{
Thank You
  • Thank you for your hard work.
  • Thank you because you are not a smoker.
  • Thank you because you are not a drunkard.
  • Thank you for loving mama to the nth power. I know that you loved her first.
  • Thank you for being such a cool father. You were the one who taught me how to play chess and solitaire. You played tong-its with me. In high school, we watched movies together while mama urged us to go to sleep because she thought it's already late when it's not 12 am yet. 
  • Thank you for your humor, you always make me laugh.
  • Thank you for your support. I remember my elementary and high school days, you hadn't disturbed me for me to do this and that because you saw me studying, when in fact, I was just pretending for me to escape executing household chores. Opppsieee...
  • Thank you for being selfless. Your wants don't come first, it is always ours.
  • And lastly, from the bottom to the top of my heart, thank you for your love Pa. I love you.
Happy Father's Day.

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