a blogger but not a writer

I'm not a good writer and I can prove it to you if you read my posts. Though there is a big chance for me to become one through hard work and perseverance, well, thanks a lot but I don't approve just the thought of it. I hate writing stuff when you're dictated by what you should be writing about and most especially when that topic doesn't interest you at all. Yeah, sorry but my precious mind doesn't like to work that way. That's what school does, right? English teachers tell you to write your "Most Unforgettable Experience", "My Autobiography", "Valentines Day" and a lot more senseless topics. But what else could they do? In that way they help us furnish our writing skills and if there's none, well, at least to teach us construct words to form sensible sentences. But I never like that pattern.. I am least enthusiastic of obeying that stuff.. Err, my mind is a bit slow in terms of expressing my ideas and putting it in English words. Yeah, you read it right--English--this foreign international language that would make you superior when you're excellent in it. Of course, it's really the hindrance why I somewhat like ending up in a state of 'mental block' in the midst of writing something. Its grammar is sophisticated unlike Tagalog and dugh, a lot of rules!! But well, it's not really about the language but i am simply not into writing. It's the most boring activity for me in school, promise!! I would rather clean the classroom than write an essay about 'Technology and Environment'. But guess what, life is really ironic because I once fantasized of becoming a famous writer someday. Bwahaha.. such a bold and audacious for me to dream like that.. Don't worry, I already dropped that fantasy a long time ago and accepted that I am made for something else. But I do confess that sometimes I feel envious to others who have a knack in writing. We can't have everything though. *sighs*

So here's the thing---but I love blogging in spite of writing.. :-) It's just a lot different from what I do in school. Here in my blog I taste every bit of freedom. I can write whenever I wanted, no need for me to cram for deadlines. I can write anything and everything under the sun. And I only write what I WANTED to write. Yeah, no rules, no formalities. So what if I write expressions like wehehe, crap, toinks, OMG!! Hehe.. This makes blogging fun. I write on my blog not because I need to but because I want to and I love it! I mostly blog when my emotions get to an unusual level of frustration, happiness, excitement, loneliness and just name the rest folks. I don't blog because I'd like to be noticed but this is more about my medium of expressing my hidden (yeah, most of them) feelings and ideas. And this serves as a record of my past. Hopefully ten years from now I shall go back reading my posts and will realize how childish and dramatic I am. I will be amused by how much I have changed since then; or maybe I wold laugh and will say to myself, "I hope people won't mean what I said.".hehe. Well, I hope a day won't come when I will go mental and will impulsively delete this blog because I don't feel like people reading it anymore (just like what I did to my previous active blog..)

So that's it guys.. I think I've said much..

PS: My posts have wrong grammar.. Some are typo errors but some are just my plain stupidity of this language's grammar. I won't edit them.. hehe.. Just let it be.. *winks*


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jelly-ace